Shopping for midget porn the other day, I came across an e-commerce site offering “Discrete Shipping”.
A Google search on “Discrete Shipping” (over 63,000 results) suggests the problem is not isolated (but hilarious).
As a committed pedant, I thought I would take this opportunity to explain the difference between “discreet” and “discrete”, and even offer a mnemonic trick for remembering the difference.
Discreet – having or showing discernment or good judgment in conduct and especially in speech (Merriam-Webster Online), as in, “Max Mosley failed to keep his Nazi-themed orgy discreet.”
Discrete – constituting a separate entity; individually distinct (Merriam-Webster Online), as in, “The five prostitutes that Max Mosley engaged for his Nazi-themed orgy were from five discrete agencies.”
So, taken literally, “discrete shipping” would mean that if I ordered three midget porn DVDs, they would arrive in three separate packages.
I’m glad that I didn’t order jelly beans.
The mnemonic trick is simple. Look at the “e”s in each spelling. Notice how the “e”s in “discrete” are separate, or discrete.
Isn’t learning fun?